Friday, February 27, 2009

Quote of the Day

Every now and then, when your life gets complicated and the weasels start closing in, the only cure is to load up on heinous chemicals and then drive like a bastard from Hollywood to Las Vegas ... with the music at top volume and at least a pint of ether.
-- Hunter S. Thompson, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Quote of the Day

Mmmm, free goo.
-- Homer J. Simpson

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Quote of the Day

Seeing, contrary to popular wisdom, isn't believing. It's where belief stops, because it isn't needed any more.
-- Terry Pratchett (Pyramids)

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Quote of the Day

Hey, what's the big deal about going to some building every Sunday? I mean, isn't God everywhere?
-- Homer J. Simpson

Monday, February 23, 2009

Quote of the Day

Men have died for this music. You can't get more serious than that.
-- Dizzy Gillespie

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Quote of the Day

If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers.
-- Homer J. Simpson

Friday, February 20, 2009

Quote of the Day

Sen. Danforth: There is nothing on the face of the album which would notify you if the record has pornographics material or material glorifying violence?
Tipper Gore: No, there is nothing that would suggest that to me.
Frank Zappa: I would say that a buzz saw blade between the guy's legs on the album cover is good indication that it's not for little Johnny.

-- The Senate Commerce Committee hearing on rock lyrics, from The Village Voice, 6 Oct 1985

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Quote of the Day

You know what I blame this on the breakdown of? Society.
-- Moe Szyslak

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Quote of the Day

The Bible is not my Book and Christianity is not my religion. I could never give assent to the long complicated statements of Christian dogma.
-- Abraham Lincoln

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Quote of the Day

In my land, women are for advancing the race, not for fighting man's battles.
-- Eros (Plan 9 from Outer Space)

Monday, February 16, 2009

Quote of the Day

I think the mistake a lot of us make is thinking the state-appointed shrink is our friend.
-- Jack Handey

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Quote of the Day

The consensus seemed to be that if really large numbers of men were sent to storm the mountain, then enough might survive the rocks to take the citadel. This is essentially the basis of all military thinking.
-- Terry Pratchett (Eric)

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Quote of the Day

...I don't think music turns people into social liabilities. Because you hear a lyric -- there's no medical proof that a person hearing a lyric is going to act out the lyric. There's also no medical proof that if you hear any collection of vowels and consonants, that the hearing of that collection is going to send you to Hell.
-- Frank Zappa

Week in Review

- Friday Random Ten: 2009-02-13
- Miserable Cities
- Forums @ drum-corps.net
- Reading: _The Ionian Mission_
- Camel Toads
- Friday Random Ten: 2009-02-06
- Sign of the times…
- Never Forget
- Airhead
- Friday Random Ten: 2009-01-30

Friday, February 13, 2009

Quote of the Day

Excess on occasion is exhilarating. It prevents moderation from acquiring the deadening effect of a habit.
-- W. Somerset Maugham

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Quote of the Day

All right, brain. You don't like me and I don't like you, but let's just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer.
-- Homer J. Simpson

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Quote of the Day

Say what you will about the Ten Commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them.
-- H.L. Mencken

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Quote of the Day

My mother didn't breast-feed me. She said she liked me as a friend.
-- Rodney Dangerfield

Monday, February 09, 2009

Quote of the Day

In West Virginia I never stop for gas, because I'm afraid I'll be caught and made someone's mountain wife. And then I'll probably grow to like the guy and end up with ten scrawny, filthy kids named Shane who always ask, "Momma, how come you don't talk like us?"
-- Kathleen Madigan

Sunday, February 08, 2009

Quote of the Day

Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals. Except the weasel.
-- Homer J. Simpson

Saturday, February 07, 2009

Quote of the Day

Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someones neck, and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing.
-- Jack Handey

Week in Review

- Camel Toads
- Friday Random Ten: 2009-02-06
- Sign of the times…
- Never Forget
- Airhead
- Friday Random Ten: 2009-01-30
- New Nordic Tug 26
- Reading: _Lords and Ladies_
- Nifty Brush Work
- Friday Random Ten: 2009-01-23

Friday, February 06, 2009

Quote of the Day

Sometimes, when I drive across the desert in the middle of the night, with no other cars around, I start imagining: What if there were no civilization out there? No cities, no factories, no people? And then I think: No people or factories? Then who made this car? And this highway? And I get so confused I have to stick my head out the window into the driving rain---unless there's lightning, because I could get struck on the head by a bolt.
-- Jack Handey

Thursday, February 05, 2009

Quote of the Day

The best that we can do is to be kindly and helpful toward our friends and fellow passengers who are clinging to the same speck of dirt while we are drifting side by side to our common doom.
-- Clarence Darrow

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Quote of the Day

It is always preferable to visit home with a friend. Your parents will not be pleased with this plan, because they want you all to themselves and because in the presence of your friend, they will have to act like mature human beings.

The worst kind of friend to take home is a girl, because in that case, there is the potential that your parents will lose you not just for the duration of the visit but forever. The worst kind of girl to take home is one of a different religion: Not only will you be lost to your parents forever but you will be lost to a woman who is immune to their religious/moral arguments and whose example will irretrievably corrupt you.

Let's say you've fallen in love with just such a girl and would like to take her home for the holidays. You are aware of your parents' xenophobic response to anyone of a different religion. How to prepare them for the shock?

Simple. Call them up shortly before your visit and tell them that you have gotten quite serious about somebody who is of a different religion, a different race and the same sex. Tell them you have already invited this person to meet them. Give the information a moment to sink in and then remark that you were only kidding, that your lover is merely of a different religion. They will be so relieved they will welcome her with open arms.

-- Playboy, January, 1983

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Quote of the Day

When you come to a fork in the road, take it.
-- Yogi Berra

Monday, February 02, 2009

Quote of the Day

They laughed at Einstein. They laughed at the Wright Brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown.
-- Carl Sagan

Sunday, February 01, 2009

Quote of the Day

Hey, don't drink that poison! That's $4.00 an ounce!
-- Dr. Hugo Z. Hackenbush