Quote of the Day

Warning: George Michael STILL wants your sex. He never rescinded the order! Stay vigilant.
-- Bill Corbett

Quote of the Day

Platitude: an idea (a) that is admitted to be true by everyone, and (b) that is not true.
-- H.L. Mencken

Quote of the Day

Empire had the better ending. I mean, Luke gets his hand cut off, finds out Vader's his father, Han gets frozen and taken away by Boba Fett. It ends on such a down note. I mean, that's what life is, a series of down endings. All Jedi had was a bunch of Muppets.
-- Dante Hicks

Quote of the Day

I'm just a normal guy who enjoys revenge.
-- Dwight Kurt Schrute III

Quote of the Day

I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, save me, Superman!
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

This perpetual motion machine she made is a joke: It just keeps going faster and faster. Lisa, get in here! In this house, we obey the laws of THERMODYNAMICS!
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water.
-- W. C. Fields

Quote of the Day

Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.
-- Terry Pratchett

Quote of the Day

History began on July 4, 1776. Everything that happened before that was a mistake.
-- Ron Swanson

Quote of the Day

There are only three ways to motivate people: money, fear, and hunger.
-- Ron Swanson