I think the mistake a lot of us make is thinking the state-appointed shrink is our friend.
-- Jack Handey
Saturday, August 27, 2016
Friday, August 26, 2016
How many hors d'oeuvres you are allowed to take off a tray being carried by a waiter at a nice party?
Two, but there are ways around it, depending on the style of the hors d'oeuvre. If they're those little pastry things where you can't tell what's inside, you take one, bite off about two-thirds of it, then say: "This is cheese! I hate cheese!" Then you put the rest of it back on the tray and bite another one and go, "Darn it! Another cheese!" and so on.
-- Dave Barry, "The Stuff of Etiquette"
Thursday, August 25, 2016
Americans like to talk about (or be told about) Democracy but, when put to the test, usually find it to be an 'inconvenience.' We have opted instead for an authoritarian system disguised as a Democracy. We pay through the nose for an enormous joke-of-a-government, let it push us around, and then wonder how all those assholes got in there.
-- Frank Zappa