Quote of the Day

Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someones neck, and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing.
-- Jack Handey

oh noez

moar funny pictures

Quote of the Day

Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.
-- Terry Pratchett

In the Parish Hall

Futurama!

Quote of the Day

The intelligent beings in these regions should therefore not be surprised if they observe that their locality in the universe satisfies the conditions that are necessary for their existence. It is a bit like a rich person living in a wealthy neighborhood not seeing any poverty.
-- Stephen Hawking

Quote of the Day

As great scientists have said and as all children know, it is above all by the imagination that we achieve perception, and compassion, and hope.
-- Ursula K. Le Guin

Images and Words

More random crapola found on the internets...

Quote of the Day

What I mean (and everybody else means) by the word QUALITY cannot be broken down into subjects and predicates. This is not because Quality is so mysterious but because Quality is so simple, immediate, and direct.
-- R. Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance

Quote of the Day

I wish I lived back in the old west days, because I'd save up my money for about twenty years so I could buy a solid-gold pick. Then I'd go out West and start digging for gold. When someone came up and asked what I was doing, I'd say, "Looking for gold, ya durn fool." He'd say, "Your pick is gold," and I'd say, "Well, that was easy." Good joke, huh.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

Bite my shiny, metal ass!
-- Bender Unit 22

Week in Review

-	Friday Random Ten: 2007-11-23
-	Happy Thanksgiving
-	Conservative Obsession with Homosexuality
-	Reading: _Great Essays in Science_
-	Time Crash
-	Friday Random Ten: 2007-11-16
-	World Hockey Association (WHA)
-	140,000
-	Creation Museum Report
-	Another sad story from Côte d’Ivoire

Quote of the Day

The National Rifle Association says, 'Gun's don't kill people. People do'. But I think the gun helps.
-- Eddie Izzard

Quote of the Day

You will find men like him in all of the world's religions. They know that we represent reason and science, and, however confident they may be in their beliefs, they fear that we will overthrow their gods. Not necessarily through any deliberate act, but in a subtler fashion. Science can destroy a religion by ignoring it as well as by disproving its tenets. No one ever demonstrated, so far as I am aware, the nonexistance of Zeus or Thor, but they have few followers now.
-- Arthur C. Clarke, Childhood's End

Quote of the Day

He that bringeth a present, findeth the door open.
-- Scottish proverb

Quote of the Day

Oh Lord, please don't burn us
Don't grill or toast your flock
Don't put us on the barbecue
Or simmer us in stock
Don't braise or bake or boil us
Or stir-fry us in a wok
Oh please don't lightly poach us
Or baste us with hot fat
Don't fricassee or roast us
Or boil us in a vat
And please don't stick thy servants Lord
In a Rotiss-o-mat.
-- Chaplain, Monty Python's The Meaning of Life

Quote of the Day

OK, but I don't want anyone thinking we're robosexuals.
-- Bender Unit 22

Quote of the Day

You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things, like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman -- stuff you pay good money for in later life.
-- Emo Philips

Quote of the Day

I think that in philosophical strictness at the level where one doubts the existence of material objects and holds that the world may have existed for only five minutes, I ought to call myself an agnostic; but, for all practical purposes, I am an atheist. I do not think the existence of the Christian God any more probable than the existence of the Gods of Olympus or Valhalla. To take another illustration: nobody can prove that there is not between Earth and Mars a china teapot revolving in an elliptic orbit, but nobody thinks this sufficiently likely to be taken into account in practice. I think the Christian God just as unlikely.
-- Bertrand Russell

Week in Review

-	Friday Random Ten: 2007-11-16
-	World Hockey Association (WHA)
-	140,000
-	Creation Museum Report
-	Another sad story from Côte d’Ivoire
-	Disturbing Imagery: Soft Drink Company Mascot Edition
-	Mr Henry Ford
-	Disturbing Imagery: Never too old to rock and roll
-	Ms. Margaret Krissie
-	Disturbing Imagery: Befuddled Ex-President Edition

Quote of the Day

I have an existential map. It has "You are here" written all over it.
-- Stephen Wright

Quote of the Day

The primary cause of failure in electrical appliances is an expired warranty. Often, you can get an appliance running again simply by changing the warranty expiration date with a 15/64-inch felt-tipped marker.
-- Dave Barry, "The Taming of the Screw"

Quote of the Day

Perhaps it is a peculiarity of mine that despite the fact that I am a professional performer, it is true that I have always preferred playing without an audience.
-- Bill Evans

Quote of the Day

Worlds are conquered, galaxies destroyed -- but a woman is always a woman.
-- James T. Kirk, "The Conscience of the King", stardate 2818.9

Quote of the Day

It had never occurred to me before that music and thinking are so much alike. In fact you could say music is another way of thinking, or maybe thinking is another kind of music.
-- Ursula K. Le Guin

Quote of the Day

But this one goes to eleven.
-- Nigel Tufnel

Quote of the Day

There are two ways of constructing a software design. One way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies and the other is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies.
-- Charles Anthony Richard Hoare

Week in Review

-	Disturbing Imagery: Befuddled Ex-President Edition
-	Friday Random Ten: 2007-11-09
-	HEINEKEN LOTTERY
-	United States Football League (USFL)
-	…we’re gonna need to go ahead and move you downstairs into storage B
-	Mr Herry Ofori
-	Drawlotto
-	Friday Random Ten: 2007-11-02
-	Sunshine International Lottery Promotions and Japan Email Lotto
-	THE ‘BOTS ARE BACK! and Cinematic Titanic

Quote of the Day

I look into the mirror
I see no happiness
All the warmth I gave you
Has turned to emptiness
The love we had has fallen
The love we used to share
You've left me here believing
In love that wasn't there
-- Yes

Quote of the Day

When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, "Did you sleep good?" I said "No, I made a few mistakes."
-- Stephen Wright

Quote of the Day

Rembrandt's first name was Beauregard, which is why he never used it.
-- Dave Barry

Quote of the Day

Ah, this is obviously some strange usage of the word 'safe' that I wasn't previously aware of.
-- Douglas Adams

Quote of the Day

Saliva causes cancer, but only if swallowed in small amounts over a long period of time.
-- George Carlin

Quote of the Day

It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity.
-- Dave Barry

Quote of the Day

And then I was confronted with N'Sync, Aerosmith and Britney Spears to*gether*. The trifecta from *Hell*.
-- Lewis Black

Week in Review

-	Friday Random Ten: 2007-11-02
-	Sunshine International Lottery Promotions and Japan Email Lotto
-	THE ‘BOTS ARE BACK! and Cinematic Titanic
-	2000 Comments
-	Nordic Tug 49
-	Reading: _Adam, Eve, and the Serpent_
-	Mahavishnu Orchestra: ‘Meeting of the Spirits’
-	Friday Random Ten: 2007-10-26
-	Now that’s a Halloween show!
-	The Mahavishnu Orchestra @ Syracuse University (1972)

Quote of the Day

The people who are regarded as moral luminaries are those who forego ordinary pleasures themselves and find compensation in interfering with the pleasures of others.
-- Bertrand Russell

Quote of the Day

In the fight between you and the world, back the world.
-- Frank Zappa