We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless you count maybe 25 or 30 little scuzzball countries like Scotland that we could vaporize in seconds if we felt like it.
-- Dave Barry
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Quote of the Day
Friday, May 30, 2008
Quote of the Day
You look like a woman who appreciates the finer things in life. Come over here and feel my velour bedspread.
-- Captain Zapp Brannigan
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Quote of the Day
The think tanks that incubated the Iraq war have lofty names like the Heritage Foundation and the Project for a New American Century. Whatever. They've been wrong so often, I'm surprised they're not my broker.
-- Bill Maher
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Quote of the Day
Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good; and when it is bad, it is better than nothing.
-- Dick Brandon
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Quote of the Day
No one has an idea really of where we should draw the line. What about the Bible? Every nut who kills people has a Bible lying around. If you're looking for violent rape imagery, the Bible's right there in your hotel room. If you just want to look up ways to screw people up, there it is, and you're justified because God told you to. You have Shakespeare and you have Sophocles--what are we going to do, lose Oedipus Rex if someone pokes an eye out?
-- Penn Jillette, from Reason magazine, on censorship of violent TV shows
Monday, May 26, 2008
Quote of the Day
If two people love each other, there can be no happy end to it.
-- Ernest Hemingway
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Quote of the Day
A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it.
-- Oscar Wilde (The Portrait of Mr. W.H.)
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Quote of the Day
You can't fool me. It's soy juice. There's no such thing as soy milk, because there's no such thing as a soy tit.
-- Lewis Black
Friday, May 23, 2008
Quote of the Day
I think that all good, right thinking people in this country are sick and tired of being told that all good, right thinking people in this country are fed up with being told that all good, right thinking people in this country are fed up with being sick and tired. I'm certainly not, and I'm sick and tired of being told that I am!
-- Monty Python
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Quote of the Day
Instead of school busing and prayer in schools, which are both controversial, why not a joint solution? Prayer in buses. Just drive these kids around all day and let them pray their fuckn' empty little heads off.
-- George Carlin, Brain Droppings
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Quote of the Day
Destiny is a good thing to accept when it's going your way. When it isn't, don't call it destiny; call it injustice, treachery, or simple bad luck.
-- Joseph Heller (God Knows)
Monday, May 19, 2008
Quote of the Day
You ever notice how all the prices end in nine? Damn, that's eerie...
-- Dante Hicks
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Quote of the Day
If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error.
-- John Kenneth Galbraith
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Quote of the Day
Hot on the heels of its magnanimous pardoning of Galileo, the Vatican has now moved with even more lightning speed to recognise the truth of Darwinism.
-- Richard Dawkins
Week in Review
Friday, May 16, 2008
Quote of the Day
Once I posed naked for a magazine. But it was very demeaning, and I've never been back to that newsstand.
-- Emo Philips
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Quote of the Day
For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.
-- H.L. Mencken
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Quote of the Day
It's like fire and ice, basically. I feel my role in the band is to be somewhere in the middle of that, kind of like lukewarm water.
-- Derek Smalls
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Quote of the Day
I have something to say to the religionist who feels atheists never say anything positive: You are an intelligent human being. Your life is valuable for its own sake. You are not second-class in the universe, deriving meaning and purpose from some other mind. You are not inherently evil--you are inherently human, possessing the positive rational potential to help make this a world of morality, peace and joy. Trust yourself.
-- Dan Barker, Losing Faith in Faith
Monday, May 12, 2008
Quote of the Day
After one look at this planet any visitor from outer space would say "I want to see the manager."
-- William S. Burroughs
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Quote of the Day
Now, like all great plans, my strategy is so simple an idiot could have devised it. On my command all ships will line up and file directly into the alien death cannons, clogging them with wreckage.
-- Captain Zapp Brannigan
Friday, May 09, 2008
Quote of the Day
Honey, I wouldn't talk about taste if I was wearing a lime green tank top.
-- Bender Unit 22
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Quote of the Day
I used to think that cyberspace was fifty years away. What I thought was fifty years away, was only ten years away. And what I thought was ten years away... it was already here. I just wasn't aware of it yet.
-- Bruce Sterling
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
Quote of the Day
I went home with a waitress,
The way I always do.
How I was I to know?
She was with the Russians too.
I was gambling in Havana,
I took a little risk.
Send lawyers, guns, and money,
Dad, get me out of this.
-- Warren Zevon, "Lawyers, Guns and Money"
Tuesday, May 06, 2008
Quote of the Day
If something is to hard to do, then it's not worth doing. You just stick that guitar in the closet next to your shortwave radio, your karate outfit and your unicycle and we'll go inside and watch TV.
-- Homer J. Simpson
Monday, May 05, 2008
Quote of the Day
I think someone should have had the decency to tell me the luncheon was free. To make someone run out with potato salad in his hand, pretending he's throwing up, is not what I call hospitality.
-- Jack Handey
Sunday, May 04, 2008
Quote of the Day
The road to this paradise was not as comfortable and alluring as the road to the religious paradise; but it has shown itself reliable, and I have never regretted having chosen it.
-- Albert Einstein
Saturday, May 03, 2008
Quote of the Day
Man usually avoids attributing cleverness to somebody else -- unless it is an enemy.
-- Albert Einstein
Week in Review
Friday, May 02, 2008
Quote of the Day
Remember, it is illegal to lick door knobs on other planets.
-- SpongeBob SquarePants
Thursday, May 01, 2008
Quote of the Day
In the strict scientific sense we all feed on death -- even vegetarians.
-- Spock, "Wolf in the Fold", stardate 3615.4
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