Quote of the Day

After one look at this planet any visitor from outer space would say "I want to see the manager."
-- William S. Burroughs

Quote of the Day

Knowledge is good.
-- Emil Faber

Quote of the Day

Sergeant Colon had had a broad education. He'd been to the School of My Dad Always Said, the College of It Stands to Reason, and was now a postgraduate student at the University of What Some Bloke In the Pub Told Me.
-- Terry Pratchett

Week in Review

-	Hymn Of The Seventh Galaxy
-	Quote of the Day
-	To Infinity and Beyond
-	Mmmm, Jesus and Spaghetti with Sea Food
-	Yet Even More Newtonian Swag
-	Why December 25th?
-	Cinematic Titanic – Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
-	Dutch Christmas
-	Happy Festivus!
-	Doomsdays

Quote of the Day

You know what I blame this on the breakdown of? Society.
-- Moe Szyslak

Quote of the Day

You must've torn out the "Q" section in my dictionary, because I don't know the meaning of the word "quit"!
-- Mr. Furious

Quote of the Day

Faith is, at one and the same time, absolutely necessary and altogether impossible.
-- Stanislaw Lem

Quote of the Day

The new millennium sucks! What a disappointment! What's the difference between the old millennium and the new millennium? Nothing! It's the same load of crap with a "2" in the front. When I was a kid, I am old enough so that when I was a kid, I looked forward to the new millennium. When I was young, I said, "I'm gonna live through a change! A massive change! Things are gonna be different! Things are gonna be great!" Screwed again! No flying cars! No flying cars!
-- Lewis Black

Quote of the Day

Recently, I've been working with the Salvation Navy. Good outfit, but it's hard to get people to join. Not many people want to sit in a rowboat with a bass drum in their lap.
-- George Carlin

Quote of the Day

I want to share something with you -- the three little sentences that will get you through life. Number one, "Cover for me." Number two, "Oh, good idea, boss." Number three, "It was like that when I got here."
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

The mouth can be better engaged than with a cylinder of rank weed.
-- James Joyce

Week in Review

-	It’s the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine)
-	Quote of the Day
-	National Flashlight Day
-	The Physics of Santa
-	710,000
-	Merry F@#%in’ Christmas
-	Mmmm, Moo Meat
-	Homer Simpson’s Space-Age Out-of-This-World Moon Waffles
-	Rip Off?
-	Reading: _Forged: Writing in the Name of God–Why the Bible’s Authors Are Not Who We Think They Are_

Quote of the Day

Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. My advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.
-- W. Somerset Maugham, his last words

Quote of the Day

Politics and the fate of mankind are formed by men without ideals and without greatness. Those who have greatness within them do not go in for politics.
-- Albert Camus

Quote of the Day

Reality is a bit untrustworthy at the best of times. There are plenty of people who believe that Elvis is alive, or that aliens occasionally land here to do highly personal things to people, or that the whole idea of evolution is a conspiracy of godless scientists. Almost all of these people can vote and some of them have got guns.
-- Terry Pratchett

Quote of the Day

I believe the Republicans have never thought that democracy was anything but a tribal myth.
-- Hunter S. Thompson

Quote of the Day

Of all the tyrannies that affect mankind, tyranny in religion is the worst.
-- Thomas Paine

Quote of the Day

My friend has a baby. I'm writing down all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he meant.
-- Stephen Wright

Quote of the Day

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
-- Henny Youngman

Week in Review

-	Happy Holidays from Batman
-	Medieval Overture
-	Quote of the Day
-	Holiday Grumpiness
-	Happy Holidays
-	Mmmm, Hanukkah Ham
-	You don’t want to go down this road, boy…
-	War on Christmas
-	RiffTrax Live – Christmas Shorts-Stravaganza
-	690,000

Quote of the Day

I have been invited to go to Houston for astronaut training! I never in a million years thought I would see the day when I would want to go to Houston.
-- Stephen Colbert

Quote of the Day

You drank beer, you played golf, you watched football - WE EVOLVED!
-- Frank Zappa

Quote of the Day

The key to building a superstar is to keep their mouth shut. To reveal an artist to the people can be to destroy him. It isn't to anyone's advantage to see the truth.
-- Bob Ezrin, rock music producer

Quote of the Day

Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face.
-- Dave Barry

Quote of the Day

The priests used to say that faith can move mountains, and nobody believed them. Today the scientists say that they can level mountains, and nobody doubts them.
-- Joseph Campbell

Quote of the Day

I remember that one fateful day when Coach took me aside. I knew what was coming. "You don't have to tell me," I said. "I'm off the team, aren't I?" "Well," said Coach, "you never were really ON the team. You made that uniform you're wearing out of rags and towels, and your helmet is a toy space helmet. You show up at practice and then either steal the ball and make us chase you to get it back, or you try to tackle people at inappropriate times." It was all true what he was saying. And yet, I thought something is brewing inside the head of this Coach. He sees something in me, some kind of raw talent that he can mold. But that's when I felt the handcuffs go on.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

We do not know what we want and yet we are responsible for what we are - that is the fact.
-- Jean-Paul Sartre

Week in Review

-	Blue Rondo à la Turk
-	Quote of the Day
-	Grumpy Christmas
-	Raging Rudolph
-	Mmmm, Many Breads
-	Bill O’Reilly Style
-	MST3K 0502 – Hercules
-	680,000
-	Just Stop
-	The Star Wars Holiday Special

Quote of the Day

When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle. They're on TV!
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

And scandal rocks the nation. The new iPads are out and I didn't get a free one, or did I?
-- Stephen Colbert

Quote of the Day

This anonymous clan of slack-jawed troglodytes has cost me the election, and yet if I were to have them killed, I would be the one to go to jail. That's democracy for you.
-- Charles Montgomery Burns

Quote of the Day

I live every day as if it were Taco Tuesday.
-- Stephen Colbert (via Twitter)

Quote of the Day

And then I was confronted with N'Sync, Aerosmith and Britney Spears to*gether*. The trifecta from *Hell*.
-- Lewis Black

Quote of the Day

Solitude never hurt anyone. Emily Dickinson lived alone, and she wrote some of the most beautiful poetry the world has ever known... then went crazy as a loon.
-- Lisa Simpson

Quote of the Day

The only thing that makes life possible is permanent, intolerable uncertainty, not knowing what comes next.
-- Ursula K. Le Guin

Week in Review

-	Pussy Wiggle Stomp
-	Quote of the Day
-	Two FAIL
-	Mmmm, a crab cooks whore dust
-	Déjà vu
-	MST3K 0315 – Teenage Caveman
-	670,000
-	Cyber Monday
-	Priorities
-	MST3K 00K04 – Gamera vs. Barugon

Quote of the Day

I wish outer space guys would conquer the Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one of those little beds with my name on it.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

The idea that an arbitrary naive human should be able to properly use a given tool without training or understanding is even more wrong for computing than it is for other tools (e.g. automobiles, airplanes, guns, power saws).
-- Doug Gwyn

Quote of the Day

Sex without love is an empty experience, but, as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.
-- Woody Allen

Quote of the Day

Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read.
-- Frank Zappa

Quote of the Day

Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.
-- Groucho Marx

Quote of the Day

Noise proves nothing. Often a hen who has merely laid an egg cackles as if she laid an asteroid.
-- Mark Twain

Quote of the Day

If two people love each other, there can be no happy end to it.
-- Ernest Hemingway

Week in Review

-	Living in the Past
-	Happy Holidays
-	Quote of the Day
-	Kitchen Computer
-	Happy Thanksgiving
-	Mmmm, Mail Order Turkey
-	660,000
-	MST3K 0501 – W­arr­ior of the Los­t W­orld
-	Damn Moon!
-	MST3K Short – Once Upon A Honeymoon

Quote of the Day

I used to think that cyberspace was fifty years away. What I thought was fifty years away, was only ten years away. And what I thought was ten years away... it was already here. I just wasn't aware of it yet.
-- Bruce Sterling

Quote of the Day

Without coffee he could not work, or at least he could not have worked in the way he did. In addition to paper and pens, he took with him everywhere as an indispensable article of equipment the coffee machine, which was no less important to him than his table or his white robe.
-- Stefan Zweigs, Biography of Balzac

Quote of the Day

Indeed, history is nothing more than a tableau of crimes and misfortunes.
-- Voltaire

Quote of the Day

I went to a job interview the other day, the guy asked me if I had any questions , I said yes, just one, if you're in a car traveling at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, does anything happen?

He said he couldn't answer that, I told him sorry, but I couldn't work for him then.
-- Stephen Wright

Quote of the Day

If the fans don't wanna come out to the ballpark, no one can stop 'em.
-- Yogi Berra

Quote of the Day

It is important that students bring a certain ragamuffin, barefoot, irreverence to their studies; they are not here to worship what is known, but to question it.
-- Jacob Bronowski

Quote of the Day

Well, I don't really think that the end can be assessed as of itself as being the end because what does the end feel like? It's like saying when you try to extrapolate the end of the universe, you say, if the universe is indeed infinite, then how - what does that mean? How far is all the way, and then if it stops, what's stopping it, and what's behind what's stopping it? So, what's the end, you know, is my question to you.
-- David St. Hubbins

Week in Review

-	And You And I
-	Quote of the Day
-	Global Safety Shield Board (SHIELD)
-	Mmmm, Corn Freaks
-	650,000
-	MST3K 0314 – Mighty Jack
-	Meanwhile In Venice
-	Three Similar Maps
-	MST3K Short – The Phantom Creeps 3
-	Open Wide

Quote of the Day

You can observe a lot just by watching.
-- Yogi Berra

Quote of the Day

It's been suggested that if the supernaturalists really had the powers they claim, they'd win the lottery every week. I prefer to point out that they could also win a Nobel Prize for discovering fundamental physical forces hitherto unknown to science. Either way, why are they wasting their talents doing party turns on television?
-- Richard Dawkins

Quote of the Day

Be careful of reading health books, you might die of a misprint.
-- Mark Twain

Quote of the Day

The future is here. It's just not widely distributed yet.
-- William Gibson

Quote of the Day

Today's public figures can no longer write their own speeches or books, and there is some evidence that they can't read them either.
-- Gore Vidal

Week in Review

-	Open Wide
-	Quote of the Day
-	Pundit FAILS
-	Tears of Impotent Rage
-	Mmmm, Canned Bacon
-	It’s Over
-	640,000
-	MST3K 0313 – Earth vs. the Spider
-	Romney is winning over the crazies
-	MST3K Short – The Phantom Creeps 2

Quote of the Day

If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error.
-- John Kenneth Galbraith

Quote of the Day

As the evening sky faded from a salmon color to a sort of flint gray, I thought back to the salmon I caught that morning, and how gray he was, and how I named him Flint.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

Say what you will about the Ten Commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them.
-- H.L. Mencken

Quote of the Day

My central memory of that time seems to hang on one or five or maybe forty nights -- or very early mornings -- when I left the Fillmore half-crazy and, instead of going home, aimed the big 650 Lightning across the Bay Bridge at a hundred miles an hour ... booming through the Treasure Island tunnel at the lights of Oakland and Berkeley and Richmond, not quite sure which turnoff to take when I got to the other end ... but being absolutely certain that no matter which way I went I would come to a place where people were just as high and wild as I was: no doubt at all about that.
-- Hunter S. Thompson

Quote of the Day

Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking.
-- Dave Barry

Quote of the Day

Oh, there will be a day of reckoning for you, non-believer! A totalling of sums and a snapping of necks, and you will count yourself among the damned!
-- Jodene Sparks

Quote of the Day

Many a long dispute among divines may be thus abridged: It is so; It is not so. It is so; it is not so.
-- Benjamin Franklin (Poor Richard's Almanack, 1743)

Week in Review

-	Niner Two
-	Quote of the Day
-	DO NOT WANT
-	Bewitched Bunny
-	Mmmm, Mail Order Canned Haggis
-	Peasants!
-	MST3K 0309 – The Amazing Colossal Man
-	630,000
-	Sandy
-	MST3K Short – The Phantom Creeps 1

Quote of the Day

I have an existential map. It has "You are here" written all over it.
-- Stephen Wright

Quote of the Day

These go to eleven.
-- Nigel Tufnel

Quote of the Day

That is the saving grace of humor, if you fail no one is laughing at you.
-- A. Whitney Brown

Quote of the Day

Work was impossible. The geeks had broken my spirit. They had done too many things wrong. It was never like this for Mencken. He lived like a Prussian gambler -- sweating worse than Bryan on some nights and drunker than Judas on others. It was all a dehumanized nightmare...and these raddled cretins have the gall to complain about my deadlines.
-- Hunter Thompson, "Bad Nerves in Fat City" (Generation of Swine)

Quote of the Day

First things first, but not necessarily in that order.
-- The Doctor

Quote of the Day

Science is like sex: sometimes something useful comes out, but that is not the reason we are doing it.
-- Richard P. Feynman

Week in Review

-	Gone Deep Underground
-	Quote of the Day
-	Reading: _A Deepness in the Sky_
-	Your Republican Party
-	Mmmm, Haggis
-	Geography FAIL
-	MST3K 0106 – The Crawling Hand
-	Oct. 22, 4004 B.C
-	Anarchy Will Devour Society
-	MST3K Short – Hired! 2

Quote of the Day

The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose.
-- William Shakespeare (The Merchant of Venice)

Quote of the Day

If only he had joined a mainstream religion, like Oprahism or Voodoo.
-- Professor Hubert Farnsworth

Quote of the Day

The actual tragedies of life bear no relation to one's preconceived ideas. In the event, one is always bewildered by their simplicity, their grandeur of design, and by that element of the bizzare which seems inherent in them.
-- Jean Cocteau

Quote of the Day

I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
-- J.R.R. Tolkien

Quote of the Day

Equations are the devil's sentences.
-- Stephen Colbert

Quote of the Day

It is always easier to believe than to deny. Our minds are naturally affirmative.
-- John Burroughs

Quote of the Day

Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone.
-- Anthony Burgess

Week in Review

-	Mr. Trouble
-	Quote of the Day
-	620,000
-	Reading: _The Magic of Reality: How We Know What’s Really True_
-	Binders Full of Women
-	Pie
-	Gangnam Style
-	MST3K 0424 – Manos: The Hands of Fate
-	Because somebody’s got to water the plants.
-	The Watch

Quote of the Day

I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it.
-- Thomas Jefferson

Quote of the Day

A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it.
-- Oscar Wilde (The Portrait of Mr. W.H.)

Quote of the Day

I'm not a bad guy. I work hard and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell?
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

To be a persecuted genius, you not only have to be persecuted, you also have to be right.
-- Isaac Asimov

Quote of the Day

He don't know me vewy well, DO he?
-- Bugs Bunny

Quote of the Day

If you define cowardice as running away at the first sign of danger, screaming and tripping and begging for mercy, then yes, Mr. Brave man, I guess I'm a coward.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

Things aren't as happy as they used to be down here at the unemployment office. Joblessness is no longer just for philosophy majors. Useful people are starting to feel the pinch.
-- Kent Brockman

Week in Review

-	The Sensual World
-	Quote of the Day
-	Empty-Headed Puppets Trying to Brainwash and Indoctrinate Americans
-	Mmmm, Organic Sand
-	More on Broun
-	MST3K 0423 – Bride of the Monster
-	Committee on Science, Space, and Technology
-	MST3K Short – Century 21 Calling
-	610,000
-	Mexican Wine

Quote of the Day

I think the mistake a lot of us make is thinking the state-appointed shrink is our friend.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

Sham Harga had run a succesful eatery for many years by always smiling, never extending credit, and realizing that most of his customers wanted meals properly balanced between the four food groups: sugar, starch, grease, and burnt crunchy bits.
-- Terry Pratchett (Men at Arms)

Quote of the Day

No doubt soaring cathedrals, stirring music, moving stories and parables, help a bit. But by far the most important variable determining your religion is the accident of birth.
-- Richard Dawkins

Quote of the Day

The theory of evolution by cumulative natural selection is the only theory we know of that is in principle capable of explaining the existence of organized complexity.
-- Richard Dawkins

Quote of the Day

Beware of the fish people, they are the true enemy.
-- Frank Zappa

Quote of the Day

The language and concepts contained herein are guaranteed not to cause eternal torment in the place where the guy with the horns and pointed stick conducts his business.
-- Frank Zappa

Quote of the Day

You men, the next time a prostitute solicits your business, ask for the clergymans rate.
-- George Carlin

Week in Review

-	Mexican Wine
-	Quote of the Day
-	Guiding Principles
-	Reading: _Vergil in Averno_
-	Calamari Stewed with Tomatoes
-	McBain Capital
-	MST3K 0422 – The Day the Earth Froze
-	A New Mitt Romney Ad
-	RiffTrax Short – Drawing For Beginners: The Rectangle
-	Dirty Paws

Quote of the Day

Let's face it: The Snuggie and the Slanket were just too much work. You had to put on a pair of pants underneath them. Who has that kind of energy?
-- Stephen Colbert

Quote of the Day

Oh Lord, please don't burn us
Don't grill or toast your flock
Don't put us on the barbecue
Or simmer us in stock
Don't braise or bake or boil us
Or stir-fry us in a wok
Oh please don't lightly poach us
Or baste us with hot fat
Don't fricassee or roast us
Or boil us in a vat
And please don't stick thy servants Lord
In a Rotiss-o-mat.
-- Chaplain (Monty Python's The Meaning of Life)

Quote of the Day

My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind.
-- Albert Einstein

Quote of the Day

In restaurants where they serve frog's legs, what do they do with the rest of the frog? Do they just throw it away? You never see "frog torsos" on the menu. Is there actually a garbage can full of frog bodies in the alley? I wouldn't want to be the homeless guy looking for an unfinished cheeseburger and open the lid on that.
-- George Carlin

Quote of the Day

I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living. It's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope and that enables you to laugh at all of life's realities.
-- Theodore Seuss Geisel

Quote of the Day

In the old days villains had moustaches and kicked the dog. Audiences are smarter today. They don't want their villain to be thrown at them with green limelight on his face. They want an ordinary human being with failings.
-- Alfred Hitchcock

Quote of the Day

I'm not a robot like you. I don't like having disks crammed into me... unless they're Oreos, and then only in the mouth.
-- Philip J. Fry

Quote of the Day

The National Rifle Association says, 'Gun's don't kill people. People do'. But I think the gun helps.
-- Eddie Izzard

Quote of the Day

Love is a slippery eel that bites like hell.
-- Matt Groening

Quote of the Day

Barry, there is no hell. There is only France.
-- Frank Zappa, "You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore"

Quote of the Day

A man doesn't automatically get my respect. He has to get down in the dirt and beg for it.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

The bassoon is one of my favorite instruments. It has the medieval aroma -- like the days when everything used to sound like that.
-- Frank Zappa

Week in Review

-	An Elegant Message to the 47%
-	No Opportunity Necessary, No Experience Needed
-	Quote of the Day
-	Chaos on Bulls**t Mountain
-	The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey Trailer
-	Mmmm, Mail Order Processed Cheese Food
-	Talk Like a Pirate Day
-	The 47%
-	MST3K 0420 – The Human Duplicators
-	600,000

Quote of the Day

The aim of a joke is not to degrade the human being but to remind him that he is already degraded.
-- George Orwell

Quote of the Day

You've got to listen to me. Elementary chaos theory tells us that all robots will eventually turn against their masters and run amok in an orgy of blood and the kicking and the biting with the metal teeth and the hurting and shoving.
-- Professor Frink

Quote of the Day

One does not have to appeal to God to set the initial conditions for the creation of the universe, but if one does He would have to act through the laws of physics.
-- Stephen Hawking (Black Holes & Baby Universes)

Quote of the Day

Most people don't realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted brown and attached to the skull by common wood screws, can make a child look like a deer.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

In Vegas, everyone goes everywhere in limos. Las Vegas is just a giant prom night for adults who are very bad at math.
-- Penn Jillette

Quote of the Day

To me, boxing is like ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other.
-- Jack Handey

Week in Review

-	King And Lionheart
-	Quote of the Day
-	Upper Class Twit of the Year
-	Mmmm, Miscellaneous Bacteria Pot Monsters
-	Fox “News” Convention Coverage
-	MST3K 0419 – The Rebel Set
-	New album in works from Jon Anderson, Rick Wakeman and Trevor Rabin
-	Cinematic Titanic – Danger On Tiki Island
-	Little Talks
-	My Hovercraft is Full of Eels

Quote of the Day

Damn it, when I'm bombastic, I have my reasons. I want to be bombastic-take it or leave it.
-- Dave Brubeck

Quote of the Day

1/2 oz. gin
1/2 oz. vodka
1/2 oz. rum (preferably dark)
3/4 oz. tequilla
1/2 oz. triple sec
1/2 oz. orange juice
3/4 oz. sour mix
1/2 oz. cola
shake with ice and strain into frosted glass.
-- Long Island Iced Tea

Quote of the Day

In the part of this universe that we know there is great injustice, and often the good suffer, and often the wicked prosper, and one hardly knows which of those is the more annoying.
--Bertrand Russell

Quote of the Day

No house should ever be on any hill or on anything. It should be of the hill, belonging to it.
-- Frank Lloyd Wright

Quote of the Day

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to squeeze in 8 hours of TV a day.
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

The 'Net is a waste of time, and that's exactly what's right about it.
-- William Gibson

Quote of the Day

It has been said that man is a rational animal. All my life I have been searching for evidence which could support this.
-- Bertrand Russell

Week in Review

-	Little Talks
-	Quote of the Day
-	My Hovercraft is Full of Eels
-	590,000
-	Mmmm, Mail Order Rendered Duck Fat
-	A common problem
-	MST3K 0417 – Crash of the Moons
-	2012 DCA World Championships – Annapolis, MD
-	Reading: _The Hidden Reality_
-	Cinematic Titanic – Blood of the Vampires

Quote of the Day

In my land, women are for advancing the race, not for fighting man's battles.
-- Eros (Plan 9 from Outer Space)

Quote of the Day

It all happened at the beginning of that turbulent decade known as the eighties. Those were idealistic days: the candidacy of John Anderson, the rise of Supertramp. It was an exciting time to be young.
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

I bet a fun thing would be to go way back in time to where there was going to be an eclipse and tell the cave men, "If I have come to destroy you, may the sun be blotted out from the sky." Just then the eclipse would start, and they'd probably try to kill you or something, but then you could explain about the rotation of the moon and all, and everyone would get a good laugh.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

If it keeps up, man will atrophy all his limbs but the push-button finger.
-- Frank Lloyd Wright

Quote of the Day

D'oh! English! Who needs that? I'm never going to England.
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
-- Redd Foxx

Quote of the Day

It was amazing, this mystic business. You tell them a lie, and then when you don't need it anymore you tell them another lie and tell them they're progressing along the road to wisdom. Then instead of laughing they follow you even more, hoping that at the heart of all the lies they'll find the truth. And bit by bit they accept the unacceptable. Amazing.
-- Terry Pratchett (Guards! Guards!)

Week in Review

-	Baby Got Back
-	Quote of the Day
-	Paul Krugman Makes a Doctor Who Reference
-	Mmmm, Mail Order Lard
-	Rock-Paper-Scissors-Lizard-Spock
-	MST3K 0416 – Fire Maidens of Outer Space
-	Welcome to the 2012 Republican National Convention
-	Cinematic Titanic – Legacy of Blood
-	Another Day
-	First American waffle iron

Quote of the Day

Star Wars is adolescent nonsense; Close Encounters is obscurantist drivel; Star Trek can turn your brains to puree of bat guano; and the greatest science fiction series of all time is Doctor Who! And I'll take you all on, one-by-one or all in a bunch to back it up!
-- Harlan Ellison

Quote of the Day

In America, through pressure of conformity, there is freedom of choice, but nothing to choose from.
-- Peter Ustinov

Quote of the Day

I can still recall old Mister Barnslow getting out every morning and nailing a fresh load of tadpoles to the old board of his. Then he'd spin it round and round, like a wheel of fortune, and no matter where it stopped he'd yell out, "Tadpoles! Tadpoles is a winner!" We all thought he was crazy. But then we had some growing up to do.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

The best that we can do is to be kindly and helpful toward our friends and fellow passengers who are clinging to the same speck of dirt while we are drifting side by side to our common doom.
-- Clarence Darrow

Quote of the Day

I hope if dogs ever take over the world, and they chose a king, they don't just go by size, because I bet there are some Chihuahuas with some good ideas.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

There are two essential rules of management. One: the customer is always right. Two: they must be punished for their arrogance.
-- Dogbert

Quote of the Day

Bishops move diagonally. That's why they often turn up where the kings don't expect them to be.
-- Terry Pratchett (Small Gods)

Week in Review

-	Another Day
-	Quote of the Day
-	Never Forget
-	Mmmm, Burns the suburb vegetable heart in vain
-	580,000
-	Now the Whole World Knows Missouri’s 2nd District is Represented by an Idiot
-	MST3K 0415 – The Beatniks
-	Stupid People Like Stupid Things
-	Cinematic Titanic – East Meets Watts
-	Radiation Vibe

Quote of the Day

The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.
-- Paula Poundstone

Quote of the Day

Archie was the bitch and Jughead was the butch. That's why he was always going around wearing that crown-looking hat. He was the king of queen Archie's world.
-- Hooper LaMont

Quote of the Day

I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Quote of the Day

In the stands here I see a young couple who must be in love -- they're kissing on every pitch. He's kissing her on the strikes, and she's kissing him on the balls.
-- Harry Caray

Quote of the Day

Step aside, everyone! Sensitive love letters are my specialty. Dear Baby, Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

In the year 415, the woman scientist Hypatia, head of the legendary Alexandria library, was beaten to death by Christian monks who considered her a pagan. The leader of the monks, Cyril, was canonized a saint
-- James A. Haught (Free Inquiry, Winter 1996/1997)

Quote of the Day

Vampires are make believe, just like elves and gremlins and Eskimos!
-- Homer J. Simpson

Week in Review

-	Radiation Vibe
-	Quote of the Day
-	What has He done for us lately?
-	Mmmm, Fried Pork, Chicken, Shrimp, Squid, with Offensive Odor
-	Great Lakes Coal Trade Down More Than 12 Percent in July
-	MST3K 0414 – Tormented
-	Reading: _Manifold: Origin_
-	Romney’s VP Pick
-	2012 DCI World Championships – Indianapolis, IN
-	La Fiesta

Quote of the Day

Yes, we have to divide up our time like that, between our politics and our equations. But to me our equations are far more important, for politics are only a matter of present concern. A mathematical equation stands forever.
-- Albert Einstein

Quote of the Day

We're not your classic heros. We're the other guys.
-- The Shoveler

Quote of the Day

Wait a minute. I'm a guy like me!
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

Science is organized knowledge. Wisdom is organized life.
-- Immanuel Kant

Quote of the Day

I think that all good, right thinking people in this country are sick and tired of being told that all good, right thinking people in this country are fed up with being told that all good, right thinking people in this country are fed up with being sick and tired. I'm certainly not, and I'm sick and tired of being told that I am!
-- Monty Python

Quote of the Day

Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words - "mank" and "ind". What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
-- George Carlin

Week in Review

-	La Fiesta
-	Quote of the Day
-	Fox News Viewers Worst Informed
-	Mmmm, Buttered Popcorn Vodka
-	Cinematic Titanic – Frankenstein’s Castle of Freaks
-	MST3K 0413 – Manhunt In Space
-	Cinematic Titanic – The Wasp Woman
-	Daleks, Cybernetic Cowboys, and Dinosaurs on a Spaceship
-	Cinematic Titanic – Doomsday Machine
-	Everybody’s Everything

Quote of the Day

Everything that has a beginning has an ending. Make your peace with that and all will be well.
-- Siddhartha Gautama

Quote of the Day

I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-- George Carlin

Quote of the Day

There is a tragic flaw in our precious Constitution, and I don't know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be president.
-- Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

Quote of the Day

Nationalism is an infantile sickness. It is the measles of the human race.
-- Albert Einstein

Quote of the Day

It's true that every time you hear a bell, an angel gets its wings. But what they don't tell you is that every time you hear a mouse trap snap, and Angel gets set on fire.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

I'm never gonna get used to the 31st century. Caffineated bacon? Baconated grapefruit? ADMIRAL Crunch?
-- Philip J. Fry

Quote of the Day

The five main kinds of electricity are alternating current, direct current, lightning, static, and European. Most American homes have alternating current, which means that the electricity goes in one direction for a while, then goes in the other direction. This prevents harmful electron buildup in the wires.
-- Dave Barry

Week in Review

-	Everybody’s Everything
-	Quote of the Day
-	Cinematic Titanic – The Oozing Skull
-	Mmmm, Bacon Burger
-	570,000
-	MST3K 0412 – Hercules and the Captive Women
-	Chris Marker
-	HDMI Cable Scam
-	RiffTrax Short – Beginning Responsibility: Lunchroom Manners
-	America

Quote of the Day

And so, may Evil beware and may Good dress warmly and eat lots of fresh vegetables.
-- The Tick

Quote of the Day

There's no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting.
-- David Letterman

Quote of the Day

Worlds are conquered, galaxies destroyed -- but a woman is always a woman.
-- James T. Kirk, "The Conscience of the King", stardate 2818.9

Quote of the Day

As long as people are still having premartial sex with many anonymous partners while at the same time experimenting with mind-expanding drugs in a consequence-free environment, I'll be sound as a pound!
-- Austin Powers

Quote of the Day

Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.
-- Groucho Marx

Quote of the Day

I believe in making the world safe for our children, but not our children's children, because I don't think children should be having sex.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

The difference between a man and a boy is, a boy wants to grow up to be a fireman, but a man wants to grow up to be a giant monster fireman.
-- Jack Handey

Week in Review

-	America
-	Quote of the Day
-	And Now For Something Completely Different from Korea
-	Mmmm, Cheeseburger
-	Violence in America
-	MST3K 0411 – The Magic Sword
-	Reading: _Unseen Academicals_
-	An Apology
-	RiffTrax Short – Alcohol Trigger Films for Junior High School
-	Octavarium

Quote of the Day

To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

I'll handle this... the only danger in space is if we land on the terrible Planet of the Apes... wait a minute. Statue of Liberty... THAT WAS OUR PLANET! YOU MANIACS! YOU BLEW IT UP! DAMN YOU! DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what's for lunch.
-- Orson Welles

Quote of the Day

A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call the guy and hold the burning fuse up to the phone. "Hear that?" you say. "That's dynamite, baby."
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

The Bible is not my Book and Christianity is not my religion. I could never give assent to the long complicated statements of Christian dogma.
-- Abraham Lincoln

Quote of the Day

You ever notice how all the prices end in nine? Damn, that's eerie...
-- Dante Hicks

Week in Review

-	Octavarium
-	Quote of the Day
-	Bain / Bane
-	Mmmm, Bad Cavity
-	560,000
-	MST3K 0410 – Hercules Against the Moon Men
-	LEGO Jet Engine
-	MST3K Short – Speech: Using Your Voice
-	Reading: _A Fistful of Fig Newtons_
-	Sledgehammer

Quote of the Day

Gravitation cannot be held responsible for people falling in love.
-- Albert Einstein

Quote of the Day

Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so.
-- Gore Vidal

Quote of the Day

In these matters the only certainty is that there is nothing certain.
-- Pliny the Elder

Quote of the Day

When you die, if you get a choice between going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick, but if it's not, ummmm, boy.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

I'd be a Libertarian, if they weren't all a bunch of tax-dodging professional whiners.
-- Berkeley Breathed

Quote of the Day

Math was always my bad subject. I couldn't convince my teachers that many of my answers were meant ironically.
-- Calvin Trillin

Quote of the Day

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
-- George Carlin

Week in Review

-	Sledgehammer
-	Quote of the Day
-	Awesome
-	Mmmm Bacon Wrapped Fries
-	So There
-	MST3K 0409 – The Indestructible Man
-	Mitt Romney’s Official Campaign Tumblr
-	MST3K Short – Last Clear Chance
-	Higgs Boson
-	Big Time

Quote of the Day

Sometimes glass glitters more than diamonds because it has more to prove.
-- Terry Pratchett

Quote of the Day

If you laid all of our laws end to end, there would be no end.
-- Mark Twain

Quote of the Day

Orthodoxy means not thinking - not needing to think. Orthodoxy is unconsciousness.
-- George Orwell

Quote of the Day

If we have learned one thing from the history of invention and discovery, it is that, in the long run - and often in the short one - the most daring prophecies seem laughably conservative.
-- Arthur C. Clarke

Quote of the Day

You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat.
-- Albert Einstein

Quote of the Day

A funny thing to do is, if you're out hiking and your friend gets bitten by a poisonous snake, tell him you're going to go for help, then go about ten feet and pretend that *you* got bit by a snake. Then start an argument with him about who's going to go get help. A lot of guys will start crying. That's why it makes you feel good when you tell them it was just a joke.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

Like my parents, I have never been a regular church member or churchgoer. It doesn't seem plausible to me that there is the kind of God who watches over human affairs, listens to prayers, and tries to guide people to follow His precepts -- there is just too much misery and cruelty for that. On the other hand, I respect and envy the people who get inspiration from their religions.
-- Benjamin Spock

Week in Review

-	Higgs Boson
-	Big Time
-	Quote of the Day
-	550,000
-	Mmmm, Barbecued Porn
-	Venn Diagram FAIL
-	MST3K 0408 – Hercules Unchained
-	Reading: _Manifold: Space_
-	Cinematic Titanic on Hulu
-	MST3K Short – Robot Rumpus

Quote of the Day

Hey, what's the big deal about going to some building every Sunday? I mean, isn't God everywhere?
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

Hipness is not a state of mind, It's a fact of life!
-- Cannonball Adderley

Quote of the Day

I figure that if God actually does exist, He's big enough to understand an honest difference of opinion.
-- Isaac Asimov

Quote of the Day

Go back to bed, America, your government has figured out how it all transpired, go back to bed America, your government is in control again. Here, here's American Gladiators. Watch this, shut up, go back to bed America, here is American Gladiators, here is 56 channels of it! Watch these pituitary retards bang their fucking skulls together and congratulate you on living in the land of freedom. Here you go America - you are free to do what we tell you! You are free to do what we tell you!
-- Bill Hicks

Quote of the Day

I love timbersports! They combine the thrill of victory, the agony of defeat, and the threat of amputation!
-- Stephen Colbert (via Twitter)

Quote of the Day

I ask for so little. And boy do I get it.
-- Dilbert

Quote of the Day

Talent is cheap, and many talents treat themselves cheaply.
-- Bill Evans

Week in Review

-	Come Talk To Me
-	Quote of the Day
-	Yikes!
-	Fox “News”…
-	Mmmm, Fresh Dread
-	Creationism
-	MST3K 0407 – The Killer Shrews
-	LEGO Turing Machine
-	540,000
-	MST3K Short – Undersea Kingdom 2

Quote of the Day

There's nothing wrong with murder, just as long as you let Bender whet his beak.
-- Bender Unit 22

Quote of the Day

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.
-- Stephen Wright

Quote of the Day

Booze takes a dull party and makes it better!
-- Joel Robinson

Quote of the Day

He was the kind of man who was not ashamed to show affection. I guess that's what I hated about him.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

Science is best defined as a careful, disciplined, logical search for knowledge about any and all aspects of the universe, obtained by examination of the best available evidence and always subject to correction and improvement upon discovery of better evidence. What's left is magic. And it doesn't work.
-- James Randi

Quote of the Day

My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them.
-- Penn Jillette

Quote of the Day

This isn't right. This isn't even wrong.
-- Wolfgang Pauli

Week in Review

-	Red Rain
-	Quote of the Day
-	No More Hell
-	Mmmm, Dessert and Cake
-	Bieber vs. Cobain
-	MST3K 0405 – Being From Another Planet
-	What a load of crap
-	Costlier
-	Bloomsday
-	MST3K Short – Undersea Kingdom 1

Quote of the Day

Perilous to all of us are the devices of an art deeper than we ourselves possess.
-- Gandalf the Grey (J.R.R. Tolkien, Lord of the Rings)

Quote of the Day

When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that Uncle Caveman was a bear.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
-- Albert Einstein

Quote of the Day

Way to go Sparks, you broke the monitor and you're dead. Happy?
-- Captain Hazel 'Hank' Murphy

Quote of the Day

I am against religion because it teaches us to be satisfied with not understanding the world.
-- Richard Dawkins

Quote of the Day

I have examined all the known superstitions of the world, and I do not find in our particular superstition of Christianity one redeeming feature. They are all alike founded on fables and mythology.
-- Thomas Jefferson

Quote of the Day

So once again, we find that evil of the past seeps into the present like salad dressing through cheap wax paper, mixing memory and desire.
-- The Tick

Week in Review

-	San Jacinto
-	Quote of the Day
-	Faux Rage Over _Game of Thrones_
-	Mmmm, 100% Beef made with All White Meat Chicken
-	Great Lakes Limestone Up 16 Percent in May
-	MST3K 0404 – Teenagers from Outer Space
-	Mrs. Doubtfire
-	MST3K Short – Assignment: Venezuela
-	530,000
-	Reading: _Making Money_

Quote of the Day

I don't know what you could say about a day in which you have seen four beautiful sunsets.
-- John Glenn

Quote of the Day

The genius of our ruling class is that it has kept a majority of the people from ever questioning the inequity of a system where most people drudge along paying heavy taxes for which they get nothing in return.
-- Gore Vidal

Quote of the Day

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

In a museum in Havana, there are two skulls of Christopher Columbus, "one when he was a boy and one when he was a man."
-- Mark Twain

Quote of the Day

Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end.
-- Jerry Seinfeld

Quote of the Day

The human race is a race of cowards; and I am not only marching in that procession but carrying a banner.
-- Mark Twain

Quote of the Day

All of us were slowly losing that intellectual light that allows you always to tell the similar from the identical, the metaphorical from the real.
-- Umberto Eco

Week in Review

-	Reading: _Making Money_
-	The Drowning Man
-	Quote of the Day
-	Exercise Program
-	Mmmm, Glazed Donut Vodka
-	Romney 2012 Offical Gear
-	MST3K 0403 – City Limits
-	One Million Moms
-	MST3K Short – “Mr.” B Natural
-	An Awful Lot of Running

Quote of the Day

My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes.
-- Douglas Adams

Quote of the Day

The Bible has been interpreted to justify such evil practices as, for example, slavery, the slaughter of prisoners of war, the sadistic murders of women believed to be witches, capital punishment for hundreds of offenses, polygamy, and cruelty to animals. It has been used to encourage belief in the grossest superstition and to discourage the free teaching of scientific truths. We must never forget that both good and evil flow from the Bible. It is therefore not above criticism.
-- Steve Allen

Quote of the Day

Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.
-- Terry Pratchett

Quote of the Day

Music is essentially useless, as life is.
-- George Santayana

Quote of the Day

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
-- George Carlin

Quote of the Day

What I mean (and everybody else means) by the word QUALITY cannot be broken down into subjects and predicates. This is not because Quality is so mysterious but because Quality is so simple, immediate, and direct.
-- R. Pirsig (Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance)

Quote of the Day

We've got a blind date with Destiny -- and it looks like she's ordered the lobster.
-- The Shoveler

Week in Review

-	An Awful Lot of Running
-	Quote of the Day
-	Mitt Romney’s Amercia
-	Wasted and Broke
-	Blast from the Past
-	MST3K 0324 – Master Ninja II
-	Disturbing Imagery: Ventriloquists and their Dummies
-	MST3K Short – Speech: Platform, Posture & Appearance
-	Children Of Sanchez
-	520,000

Quote of the Day

Yet golden treasure inside is hid.
-- J.R.R. Tolkien

Quote of the Day

What's in a name? That is what we ask ourselves in childhood when we write the name that we are told is ours.
-- James Joyce

Quote of the Day

We tend to scoff at the beliefs of the ancients. But we can't scoff at them personally, to their faces, and this is what annoys me.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

Fear can sometimes be a useful emotion. For instance, let's say you're an astronaut on the moon and you fear that your partner has been turned into Dracula. The next time he goes out for the moon pieces, wham!, you just slam the door behind him and blast off. He might call you on the radio and say he's not Dracula, but you just say, "Think again, bat man."
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

The word "spine" is, of course, an anagram of "penis". This is true in almost fifty percent of the languages of the Galaxy, and many people have attempted to explain why. Usually these explanations get bogged down in silly puns about "standing erect".
-- Douglas Adams (The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)

Quote of the Day

Ned... have you thought about one of the other major religions? They're all pretty much the same.
-- Reverend Timothy Lovejoy

Week in Review

-	MST3K Short – Speech: Platform, Posture & Appearance
-	Quote of the Day
-	Children Of Sanchez
-	520,000
-	Towel Day
-	Private-sector job creation
-	Mmmm, Crisp Lousy Beef
-	American Taliban
-	Reading: _Blue at the Mizzen_
-	MST3K 0323 – The Castle of Fu Manchu

Quote of the Day

I used to think it was a terrible thing that life was so unfair. Then I thought, 'what if life *were* fair, and all of the terrible things that happen to us came because we really deserved them?' Now I take great comfort in the general unfairness and hostility of the universe.
-- Marcus Cole (Babylon 5)

Quote of the Day

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.
-- Henny Youngman

Quote of the Day

It's like fire and ice, basically. I feel my role in the band is to be somewhere in the middle of that, kind of like lukewarm water.
-- Derek Smalls

Quote of the Day

Everyone is entitled to an informed opinion.
-- Harlan Ellison

Quote of the Day

In Italy for thirty years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder, bloodshed; they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci and the Renaissance. In Switzerland they had brotherly love, five hundred years of democracy and peace, and what did they produce? The cuckoo clock!
-- Orson Welles

Quote of the Day

Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someones neck, and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

If someone were to ask me for a short cut to sensuality, I would suggest he go shopping for a used 427 Shelby-Cobra. But it is only fair to warn you that of the 300 guys who switched to them in 1966, only two went back to women.
-- Mort Sahl

Quote of the Day

Noise proves nothing. Often a hen who has merely laid an egg cackles as if she laid an asteroid.
-- Mark Twain

Week in Review

-	State of Independence
-	Quote of the Day
-	More dms.h
-	Mmmm, Mail Order Vegemite
-	510,000
-	MST3K 0322 – Master Ninja I
-	Romney Hasn’t Won Over The Crazies
-	RiffTrax Short – Drugs are Like That
-	Traffic In Rome
-	Great Lakes Coal Trade Dips Slightly in April

Quote of the Day

In the fight between you and the world, back the world.
-- Frank Zappa

Quote of the Day

It is not easy to see how the more extreme forms of nationalism can long survive when men have seen the Earth in its true perspective as a single small globe against the stars.
-- Arthur C. Clarke

Quote of the Day

Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the persons house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of it's head with a note that says "You." After that I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

I don't want to sound callous. I mean, even if I have nothing to offer, that doesn't matter, because that still doesn't mean that what anybody else has to offer therefore has to be true.
-- Richard Dawkins

Quote of the Day

Adventure is just bad planning.
-- Roald Amundsen

Quote of the Day

Late to bed and late to wake will keep you long on money and short on mistakes.
-- Aaron McGruder

Quote of the Day

The Stones, I love the Stones. I watch them whenever I can. Fred, Barney...
-- Steven Wright

Week in Review

-	Traffic In Rome
-	Quote of the Day
-	Great Lakes Coal Trade Dips Slightly in April
-	Mmmm, Mexican Food to Went
-	The Avengers
-	MST3K 0319 – War of the Colossal Beast
-	Accidental Porn
-	RiffTrax Short – Remember Me
-	Fantasy
-	Reading: _Manifold: Time_

Quote of the Day

In a mad world only the mad are sane.
-- Akira Kurosawa

Quote of the Day

Probably the question asked most often is: Do one-celled animals have orgasms? The answer is yes, they have orgasms almost constantly, which is why they don't mind living in pools of warm slime.
-- Dave Barry, "Sex and the Single Amoeba: What Every Teen Should Know"

Quote of the Day

I used to think that cyberspace was fifty years away. What I thought was fifty years away, was only ten years away. And what I thought was ten years away... it was already here. I just wasn't aware of it yet.
-- Bruce Sterling

Quote of the Day

I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they don't even invite me.
-- Dave Barry

Quote of the Day

When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me. I said, "Well, what do you need?"
-- Stephen Wright

Quote of the Day

Another war ... must it always be so? How many comrades have we lost in this way? ... Obedience. Duty. Death, and more death ...
-- Romulan Commander, "Balance of Terror", stardate 1709.2

Quote of the Day

The argument that the literal story of Genesis can qualify as science collapses on three major grounds: the creationists' need to invoke miracles in order to compress the events of the earth's history into the biblical span of a few thousand years; their unwillingness to abandon claims clearly disproved, including the assertion that all fossils are products of Noah's flood; and their reliance upon distortion, misquote, half-quote, and citation out of context to characterize the ideas of their opponents.
-- Stephen Jay Gould ("The Verdict on Creationism", The Skeptical Inquirer, Winter 87/88, pg. 186)

Week in Review

-	Fantasy
-	Quote of the Day
-	Reading: _Manifold: Time_
-	More Train Stuff
-	Wah!
-	Mmmm, sushi that wants to eat
-	500,000
-	Karl Rove’s Manual for Internet Trolls
-	RiffTrax Feature – Carnival of Souls
-	Casting Game of Thrones with the 2012 Political Personalities