That is the saving grace of humor, if you fail no one is laughing at you.
-- A. Whitney Brown
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
Quote of the Day
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Quote of the Day
Work was impossible. The geeks had broken my spirit. They had done too many things wrong. It was never like this for Mencken. He lived like a Prussian gambler -- sweating worse than Bryan on some nights and drunker than Judas on others. It was all a dehumanized nightmare...and these raddled cretins have the gall to complain about my deadlines.
-- Hunter Thompson, "Bad Nerves in Fat City" (Generation of Swine)
Monday, October 29, 2012
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Quote of the Day
Science is like sex: sometimes something useful comes out, but that is not the reason we are doing it.
-- Richard P. Feynman
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Friday, October 26, 2012
Quote of the Day
The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose.
-- William Shakespeare (The Merchant of Venice)
Thursday, October 25, 2012
Quote of the Day
If only he had joined a mainstream religion, like Oprahism or Voodoo.
-- Professor Hubert Farnsworth
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
Quote of the Day
The actual tragedies of life bear no relation to one's preconceived ideas. In the event, one is always bewildered by their simplicity, their grandeur of design, and by that element of the bizzare which seems inherent in them.
-- Jean Cocteau
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Quote of the Day
I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
-- J.R.R. Tolkien
Monday, October 22, 2012
Sunday, October 21, 2012
Quote of the Day
It is always easier to believe than to deny. Our minds are naturally affirmative.
-- John Burroughs
Saturday, October 20, 2012
Friday, October 19, 2012
Quote of the Day
I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it.
-- Thomas Jefferson
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Quote of the Day
A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it.
-- Oscar Wilde (The Portrait of Mr. W.H.)
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Quote of the Day
I'm not a bad guy. I work hard and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell?
-- Homer J. Simpson
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Quote of the Day
To be a persecuted genius, you not only have to be persecuted, you also have to be right.
-- Isaac Asimov
Monday, October 15, 2012
Sunday, October 14, 2012
Quote of the Day
If you define cowardice as running away at the first sign of danger, screaming and tripping and begging for mercy, then yes, Mr. Brave man, I guess I'm a coward.
-- Jack Handey
Saturday, October 13, 2012
Quote of the Day
Things aren't as happy as they used to be down here at the unemployment office. Joblessness is no longer just for philosophy majors. Useful people are starting to feel the pinch.
-- Kent Brockman
Week in Review
Friday, October 12, 2012
Quote of the Day
I think the mistake a lot of us make is thinking the state-appointed shrink is our friend.
-- Jack Handey
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Quote of the Day
Sham Harga had run a succesful eatery for many years by always smiling, never extending credit, and realizing that most of his customers wanted meals properly balanced between the four food groups: sugar, starch, grease, and burnt crunchy bits.
-- Terry Pratchett (Men at Arms)
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Quote of the Day
No doubt soaring cathedrals, stirring music, moving stories and parables, help a bit. But by far the most important variable determining your religion is the accident of birth.
-- Richard Dawkins
Tuesday, October 09, 2012
Quote of the Day
The theory of evolution by cumulative natural selection is the only theory we know of that is in principle capable of explaining the existence of organized complexity.
-- Richard Dawkins
Monday, October 08, 2012
Sunday, October 07, 2012
Quote of the Day
The language and concepts contained herein are guaranteed not to cause eternal torment in the place where the guy with the horns and pointed stick conducts his business.
-- Frank Zappa
Saturday, October 06, 2012
Quote of the Day
You men, the next time a prostitute solicits your business, ask for the clergymans rate.
-- George Carlin
Friday, October 05, 2012
Quote of the Day
Let's face it: The Snuggie and the Slanket were just too much work. You had to put on a pair of pants underneath them. Who has that kind of energy?
-- Stephen Colbert
Thursday, October 04, 2012
Quote of the Day
Oh Lord, please don't burn us
Don't grill or toast your flock
Don't put us on the barbecue
Or simmer us in stock
Don't braise or bake or boil us
Or stir-fry us in a wok
Oh please don't lightly poach us
Or baste us with hot fat
Don't fricassee or roast us
Or boil us in a vat
And please don't stick thy servants Lord
In a Rotiss-o-mat.
-- Chaplain (Monty Python's The Meaning of Life)
Wednesday, October 03, 2012
Quote of the Day
My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind.
-- Albert Einstein
Tuesday, October 02, 2012
Quote of the Day
In restaurants where they serve frog's legs, what do they do with the rest of the frog? Do they just throw it away? You never see "frog torsos" on the menu. Is there actually a garbage can full of frog bodies in the alley? I wouldn't want to be the homeless guy looking for an unfinished cheeseburger and open the lid on that.
-- George Carlin
Monday, October 01, 2012
Quote of the Day
I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living. It's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope and that enables you to laugh at all of life's realities.
-- Theodore Seuss Geisel
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