In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.
-- Paul Dirac
Thursday, January 31, 2013
Quote of the Day
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Quote of the Day
A sect or party is an elegant incognito devised to save a man from the vexation of thinking.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Quote of the Day
Maturity is a bitter disappointment for which no remedy exists, unless laughter can be said to remedy anything.
-- Kurt Vonnegut Jr.
Monday, January 28, 2013
Quote of the Day
Do not worry about your problems in mathematics. I assure you, my problems with mathematics are much greater than yours.
-- Albert Einstein
Sunday, January 27, 2013
Quote of the Day
Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a moron..
-- George Carlin
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Quote of the Day
The last time somebody said, "I find I can write much better with a word processor.", I replied, "They used to say the same thing about drugs."
-- Roy Blount, Jr.
Friday, January 25, 2013
Quote of the Day
Don't tell me God works in mysterious ways. There's nothing so mysterious about it. He's not working at all. He's playing. Or else He's forgotten all about us. That's the kind of God you people talk about- a country bumpkin, a clumsy, bungling, brainless, conceited, uncouth hayseed. Good God, how much reverance can you have for a Supreme being who finds it necessary to include such phenomena as phlegm and tooth decay in His divine system of creation? What in the world was going through that warped, evil, scatalogical mind of His when He robbed old people of the ability to control their bowel movements? Why in the world did He ever create pain....
Who created the dangers? Oh, He was really being charitable to us when He gave us pain! Why couldn't He have used a doorbell instead to notify us, or one of His celestial choirs? Or a system of red and blue neon tubes right in the middle of each person's forehead?....
They certainly look beautiful now, w rithing in agony or stupified with morphine, don't they? What a colossal, immortal blunderer! When you consider the opportunity and power He had to really do a job and then look at the stupid, ugly little mess He made of it instead, His sheer incompetence is almost staggering. It's obvious He never met a payroll. Why,no self-respecting businessman would hire a bungler like Him as even a shipping clerk!
-- Yossarian (Catch-22, Joseph Heller)
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Quote of the Day
There's an old saying about those who forget history. I don't remember it, but it's good.
-- Stephen Colbert
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Quote of the Day
Why isn't there a name for the meal between breakfast and brunch?
-- Stephen Colbert (via Twitter)
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Quote of the Day
If I had a mine shaft, I don't think I would just abandon it. There's got to be a better way.
-- Jack Handey
Monday, January 21, 2013
Quote of the Day
Consistently separating words by spaces became a general custom about the tenth century, and lasted until about 1957, when FORTRAN abandoned the practise.
-- Sun FORTRAN Reference Manual
Sunday, January 20, 2013
Quote of the Day
I still went to church regularly, though, until I was eighteen years old. Then suddenly, the light bulb went on over my head. All the mindless morbidity and discipline was pretty sick--bleeding this, painful that and no meat on Friday. What is this shit?
-- Frank Zappa
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Quote of the Day
You know what would make a good story? Something about a clown who make people happy, but inside he's real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea.
-- Jack Handey
Friday, January 18, 2013
Quote of the Day
Someday, Weederman, we'll look back on all this and laugh... It will probably be one of those deep, eerie ones that slowly builds to a blood-curdling maniacal scream... but still it will be a laugh.
-- Mister Boffo
Thursday, January 17, 2013
Quote of the Day
Well, you know boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like a woman. You just have to read the manual and press the right button.
-- Homer J. Simpson
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Quote of the Day
Well, ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole because the general speed and health of the group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.
In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers.
-- Clifford C. Clavin Jr.
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Quote of the Day
Don't start an argument with somebody who has a microphone when you don't. They'll make you look like chopped liver.
-- Harlan Ellison
Monday, January 14, 2013
Quote of the Day
Orthodoxy means not thinking - not needing to think. Orthodoxy is unconsciousness.
-- George Orwell
Sunday, January 13, 2013
Quote of the Day
Someone did a study of the three most-often-heard phrases in New York City. One is "Hey, taxi." Two is, "What train do I take to get to Bloomingdale's?" And three is, "Don't worry. It's just a flesh wound."
-- David Letterman
Saturday, January 12, 2013
Quote of the Day
It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.
-- Douglas Adams
Week in Review
Friday, January 11, 2013
Quote of the Day
I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
-- George Carlin
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Quote of the Day
The foundation of morality should not be made dependent on myth nor tied to any authority lest doubt about the myth or about the legitimacy of the authority imperil the foundation of sound judgment and action.
-- Albert Einstein
Wednesday, January 09, 2013
Quote of the Day
The study of theology, as it stands in Christian churches, is the study of nothing; it is founded on nothing; it rests on no principles; it proceeds by no authorities; it has no data; it can demonstrate nothing; and it admits of no conclusion.
-- Thomas Paine (The Age of Reason, 1794)
Tuesday, January 08, 2013
Quote of the Day
All of us were slowly losing that intellectual light that allows you always to tell the similar from the identical, the metaphorical from the real.
-- Umberto Eco
Monday, January 07, 2013
Sunday, January 06, 2013
Quote of the Day
Its name is Public Opinion. It is held in reverence. It settles everything. Some think it is the voice of God.
-- Mark Twain
Saturday, January 05, 2013
Friday, January 04, 2013
Quote of the Day
The Internet is the most powerful stupidity amplifier ever invented. It's like television without the television part.
-- James "Kibo" Perry
Thursday, January 03, 2013
Quote of the Day
The whole earth is in jail and we're plotting this incredible jailbreak.
-- Wavy Gravy
Wednesday, January 02, 2013
Tuesday, January 01, 2013
Quote of the Day
A composer is a guy who goes around forcing his will on unsuspecting air molecules,often with the assistence of unsuspecting musicians.
-- Frank Zappa
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