You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat.
-- Albert Einstein
Sunday, March 31, 2013
Quote of the Day
Saturday, March 30, 2013
Quote of the Day
What we need in this country, instead of Daylight Savings Time, which nobody really understands anyway, is a new concept called Weekday Morning Time, whereby at 7 a.m. every weekday we go into a space-launch-style "hold" for two to three hours, during which it just remains 7 a.m. This way we could all wake up via a civilized gradual process of stretching and belching and scratching, and it would still be only 7 a.m. when we were ready to actually emerge from bed.
-- Dave Barry
Friday, March 29, 2013
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Quote of the Day
What I envy most about tater tots is the way they stay young and innocent forever.
-- Stephen Colbert (via Twitter)
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
Quote of the Day
The creed whose legitimacy is most easily challenged is likely to develop the strongest proselytizing impulse. It is doubtful whether a movement which does not profess some preposterous and patently irrational dogma can be possessed of that zealous drive which "must either win men or destroy the world." It is also plausible that those movements with the greatest inner contradiction between profession and practice-that is to say with a strong feeling of guilt-are likely to be the most fervent in imposing their faith on others.
-- Eric Hoffer, The True Believer, 1951, section 88
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
Quote of the Day
Politicians should read science fiction, not westerns and detective stories.
-- Arthur C. Clarke
Monday, March 25, 2013
Quote of the Day
The man who worships a tyrant in heaven naturally submits his neck to the yoke of tyrants on earth.
-- George W. Foote (Flowers of Freethought)
Sunday, March 24, 2013
Quote of the Day
I bet when the neanderthal kids would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, "Don't forget the thick, heavy brows." Then they would all get embarrassed because they remembered they had the big hunky brows too, and they'd get mad and eat the snowman.
-- Jack Handey
Saturday, March 23, 2013
Quote of the Day
The bad reputation UNIX has gotten is totally undeserved, laid on by people who don't understand, who have not gotten in there and tried anything.
-- Jim Joyce, former computer science lecturer at the University of California
Week in Review
Friday, March 22, 2013
Quote of the Day
I think one way the cops could make money would be to hold a murder weapons sale. Many people could really use used ice picks.
-- Jack Handey
Thursday, March 21, 2013
Quote of the Day
Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get.
-- Homer J. Simpson
Wednesday, March 20, 2013
Quote of the Day
The more I study religions the more I am convinced that man never worshipped anything but himself.
-- Sir Richard F. Burton
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
Quote of the Day
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
-- Rita Rudner
Monday, March 18, 2013
Sunday, March 17, 2013
Saturday, March 16, 2013
Quote of the Day
(Religion) With or without it you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion
-- Steven Weinberg
Week in Review
Friday, March 15, 2013
Quote of the Day
I'm a firm believer in the philosophy of a ruling class. Especially since I rule.
-- Randal Graves
Thursday, March 14, 2013
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
Quote of the Day
Science is facts; just as houses are made of stones, so is science made of facts; but a pile of stones is not a house and a collection of facts is not necessarily science.
-- Henri Poincare
Monday, March 11, 2013
Quote of the Day
Nothing can be more contrary to religion and the clergy than reason and common sense.
-- Voltaire
Sunday, March 10, 2013
Quote of the Day
Baseball has the great advantage over cricket of being sooner ended.
-- George Bernard Shaw
Saturday, March 09, 2013
Week in Review
Friday, March 08, 2013
Quote of the Day
A man of genius makes no mistakes. His errors are volitional and are the portals of discovery.
-- James Joyce (Ulysses)
Thursday, March 07, 2013
Quote of the Day
If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers.
-- Homer J. Simpson
Wednesday, March 06, 2013
Quote of the Day
It was the greatest night of my life. I'd been invited to the Captain's Table. I'd only been with the company fourteen years. Six officers and me! They called me "Arnold." We had gazpacho soup for starters. I didn't know gazpacho soup was meant to be served cold. I called over the chef and I told him to take it away and bring it back hot. He did. The looks on their faces still haunt me today! I thought they were laughing at the chef, when all the time, they were laughing at me as I ate my piping hot gazpacho soup. I never ate at the Captain's Table again. That was the end of my career.
-- Arnold Judas Rimmer
Tuesday, March 05, 2013
Quote of the Day
It's like something out of that twilighty show about that zone.
-- Homer J. Simpson
Monday, March 04, 2013
Quote of the Day
When they say, "Gee, it's an information explosion!" --no, it's not an explosion, it's a disgorgement of the bowels is what it is. Every idiotic thing that anybody could possibly write or say or think can get into the body politic now --where before things would have to have some merit to go through the publishing routine, now, anything. And all you're getting is an explosion of useless crap, which added to the other useless crap that was being done originally, only makes it that much worse."
-- Harlan Ellison
Sunday, March 03, 2013
Quote of the Day
Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.
-- Homer J. Simpson
Saturday, March 02, 2013
Quote of the Day
A is for awk, which runs like a snail, and
B is for biff, which reads all your mail.
C is for cc, as hackers recall, while
D is for dd, the command that does all.
E is for emacs, which rebinds your keys, and
F is for fsck, which rebuilds your trees.
G is for grep, a clever detective, while
H is for halt, which may seem defective.
I is for indent, which rarely amuses, and
J is for join, which nobody uses.
K is for kill, which makes you the boss, while
L is for lex, which is missing from DOS.
M is for more, from which less was begot, and
N is for nice, which it really is not.
O is for od, which prints out things nice, while
P is for passwd, which reads in strings twice.
Q is for quota, a Berkeley-type fable, and
R is for ranlib, for sorting ar table.
S is for spell, which attempts to belittle, while
T is for true, which does very little.
U is for uniq, which is used after sort, and
V is for vi, which is hard to abort.
W is for whoami, which tells you your name, while
X is, well, X, of dubious fame.
Y is for yes, which makes an impression, and
Z is for zcat, which handles compression.
-- THE ABC'S OF UNIX
Friday, March 01, 2013
Quote of the Day
Fear can sometimes be a useful emotion. For instance, let's say you're an astronaut on the moon and you fear that your partner has been turned into Dracula. The next time he goes out for the moon pieces, wham!, you just slam the door behind him and blast off. He might call you on the radio and say he's not Dracula, but you just say, "Think again, bat man."
-- Jack Handey