Quote of the Day

Honor: if you need it defined, you don't have it.
-- Ron Swanson

Quote of the Day

Communism is like one big phone company.
-- Lenny Bruce

Quote of the Day

Hey Fry, I'm steering with my ass!
-- Bender Unit 22

Quote of the Day

If you ever teach a yodeling class, probably the hardest thing is to keep the students from just trying to yodel right off. You see, we build to that.
-- Jack Handey

Quote of the Day

A lottery is a tax on people who are bad at math. That's why I like them. If we could find a way to tax people who are bad at English, science and history I'd be a happy camper.
-- Dana Blankenhorn

Quote of the Day

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
-- George Carlin

Quote of the Day

Instead of school busing and prayer in schools, which are both controversial, why not a joint solution? Prayer in buses. Just drive these kids around all day and let them pray their fuckn' empty little heads off.
-- George Carlin (Brain Droppings)

Quote of the Day

We do not know what we want and yet we are responsible for what we are - that is the fact.
-- Jean-Paul Sartre

Quote of the Day

Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles' heel, if you will.
-- Homer J. Simpson

Quote of the Day

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.
-- Dave Barry